I Am Tired

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🙏जब जागो तब सवेरा🙏

I Am Tired |
Wednesday – August 5, 2026

For some reason, certain people are more disposed to suffering than others may be. I am not one of these people (men), because I simply refuse to suffer of my own accord. Now, you may argue, and you would quite right in arguing so, that certain men are more likely to suffer because God has made it so, and yes sometimes certain men do suffer more because of God, and while I do believe that this is often true for me, I also do not wish to take any kind of credit for something that is not of my own making; I do also understand that yes, it is still my own making, but that would only be so if I was in complete control, if I had actually received the full proof of the name of Yahweh. That is to say: if I am going to suffer without cause, then I have to ascend the corporeal to find the true cause, because of course there is always a cause for suffering, and sometimes the master must lead his student down to the pit, in order for his student to actually gain real awareness of the world and of his own domain. How are you supposed to excel at anything, in this case the sacred arts, if you do not know the sight of the dark (the malefic) side of your own arts? How is a man supposed to know his own depths if he does not know of the abyss, his own abyss? That stated, I will grant that some men are better off living in complete ignorance, for they simply do not know how to control themselves, and if they did manage to somehow gain control of themselves then they would only grow into monsters and false preachers, and as far as I am aware, there are enough of such people around.

    As the title of this post makes clear: I am tired. Yes, I am tired because I am jet lagged and because I am in a mediterranean climate and because subtropical climates tend to not only make me but most people tired. But again, this was supposed to be a vacation and it is a vacation, but more of a trip and this is why I now regret having used the word "vacation" to describe this trip. Anyhow, I have still not managed to take photographs that are suitable for this blog. Of course, I have traveled here (to Türkiye) in order to see some ancient cities and in order to document information that is of interest. What is also of interest to me is ancient Egypt, a location that I intend to document later. Now, I should also warn that whenever you go out into the world, there are going to be some tourists everywhere, and for the most part they can be dealt with, but it is certainly undeniable that many tourists do not know of anything and they gladly trample all over the ancient world. Think about that: many of these ancient Greek, Spartan, Antatollian, etc., cities have stood in ruins for thousands of years, only for a fat tourist to walk all over those ruins. To me, this is offensive and so upsetting that I had to take a break the other day, and this is the reason why I did not end up taking any successful images. Also, the ignorance of these people: why are you taking your time and effort to travel to another land to then just sit around and do nothing of interest? In that case, you should be better off staying home, or perhaps travel down the coast where I hear that people can go on a beach trip, something that is of no interest whatsoever for me. No, I am not heading off to the seaside anytime soon. What I can say about people that appear to be heading for the beaches (about 15 miles to the south of me), is that they are very scantily clothed, especially some of the women, but the men to; there are certain fat men who are walking around up here, where you cannot go to the beach because there are none around, without any shirt on and they are just taking up all spaces in all places with their so-called "beer bellies", and of course most of these tourists are European, which means that they do have a very wicked conception of most of these matters. But I cannot understand why someone would think for a second that it is appropriate to walk around almost naked, especially when you are fat, but even if you are not fat? Of course, I am used to intense sunshine, and this is actually another reason why I am not walking around without too much clothes on, because I need to also protect my skin as I also have to protect my dignity. It is sad though, I must add, that Islam and the doctrines of Sunni islam (Fiqh, فقه) have fallen off quite a bit here I can imagine, and sometimes I wonder how many people in this part of Türkiye actually care for Islamic doctrine? Now, I hear that in Eastern Türkiye, there are more "conservative" people, but those people have also been referred to as "fundamentalists", and I do not like fundamentalism, because they do tend to have a very stupid conception of the world and of their own belief, because everything is always about belief with fundamentalists it seems, read "Should You Have Faith?". The point was never to be stubborn, uneducated, and ignorant, especially about stuff that we do not know anything about, but for more on this I direct you to the scholars, who must remain nameless.

    As I stated above, I am jet lagged but not as much today, but because I am jet lagged I do feel a certain unease about walking and about drinking water and certainly about eating, but this has to do as well with my gallbladder. So, all of these things considered, I suppose my jet lag may be ongoing for longer that what I would have prefered; of course, I would have prefered no jet lag at all, but that is just not a current possibility, and even if it was possible to cure all jet lag almost instantly, I would struggle to trust this miracle cure, because I simply do not believe in miracle cures, especially not after the recent medical debacle that ended up affecting the world. Yes, I do not wish to go into further details about that, but you can imagine how I must feel, sitting her jet lagged and feeling afraid of asking important questions. Anyhow, I am off to another city tomorrow called Side—yes Side and not side—and there I will take some photographs that I may be able to actually use on this blog, read "My Views on Photography and the Camera Obscura", because I still much prefer paintings over photographs.

Reginald Drax (M. C. Dutt) – August 5, 2026.